A Case Only In the Twilight Zone
Ladies and Gentlemen,
On October 17,2006, some food items have been allegedly stolen from the Casali Lab fridge. Specifically, that of our Administrative Assistant, April Hinshaw-Toland. What could have been an eery and unsolved case might turn out to be more than just a case of poor manners but an interlab incident that might spark a war between rival factions of the Hewitt labs. Debriefing you is private investigator, known only to us as the limping detective. Here are his accounts.
Here is what we understand so far, around the hours of 8:00, One of the lab personnel noted a food item left on one of the food tables. Upon examination, he indicated that it was some thick yellowish sauce with a stench of garlic or spice. Later that night, another member of the Casali lab acts on a lead that there is food in the lunch room only to discover the items are missing. The missing items report is filed at lunch time the next day. The evidence has thus far exonerated the any suspects from the Casali lab. There is only one thing to do really, institute a dragnet. Through subtle interrogation it is found that an individual from the surrounding labs has taken the food under the impression that it was leftovers from a party that he was told he can have. Plea bargaining finally coaxes the alleged perpetrator of returning the lost food items.
Case closed, everyone is content??? Hardly, by the time authorities were able to return the items, the victim's lunch hour had passed and with suspicions mounting over the tampering of the items, the items are no longer usable.
Presented for your consideration, April Hinshaw-Toland, Administrative Assistant, friend of all, rival of none. Kind, courteous, but above all else unfortunate. To have the items gone, then returned only to become unusable. The inaccessible nature of things whether near or far, so imposing so as to render its presence obsolete altogether. An ultimate paradox in taking from those who are giving, and seeking what is inevetably thrown back into the sea of a world full of irony and predictable only in peril. A world known only as...the twilight zone.
On October 17,2006, some food items have been allegedly stolen from the Casali Lab fridge. Specifically, that of our Administrative Assistant, April Hinshaw-Toland. What could have been an eery and unsolved case might turn out to be more than just a case of poor manners but an interlab incident that might spark a war between rival factions of the Hewitt labs. Debriefing you is private investigator, known only to us as the limping detective. Here are his accounts.
Here is what we understand so far, around the hours of 8:00, One of the lab personnel noted a food item left on one of the food tables. Upon examination, he indicated that it was some thick yellowish sauce with a stench of garlic or spice. Later that night, another member of the Casali lab acts on a lead that there is food in the lunch room only to discover the items are missing. The missing items report is filed at lunch time the next day. The evidence has thus far exonerated the any suspects from the Casali lab. There is only one thing to do really, institute a dragnet. Through subtle interrogation it is found that an individual from the surrounding labs has taken the food under the impression that it was leftovers from a party that he was told he can have. Plea bargaining finally coaxes the alleged perpetrator of returning the lost food items.
Case closed, everyone is content??? Hardly, by the time authorities were able to return the items, the victim's lunch hour had passed and with suspicions mounting over the tampering of the items, the items are no longer usable.
Presented for your consideration, April Hinshaw-Toland, Administrative Assistant, friend of all, rival of none. Kind, courteous, but above all else unfortunate. To have the items gone, then returned only to become unusable. The inaccessible nature of things whether near or far, so imposing so as to render its presence obsolete altogether. An ultimate paradox in taking from those who are giving, and seeking what is inevetably thrown back into the sea of a world full of irony and predictable only in peril. A world known only as...the twilight zone.
posted by Irvine Coyote at 6:31 PM
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